Everyone has a story to tell. He or she may be the person standing right next to you, a patient that you attend to or even just a passerby. They do not carry an expression that is easy for you to read. The thing is, how many of us are willing to search for the story of what lies behind. Often, we are confined to the mindset of "getting work done" and we tend to ignore their feelings. When you diagnose a patient with terminal cancer and then you just sleep through the night without having to worry about it. That patient whom you just diagnosed, may have a sleepless night, perhaps countless sleepless nights with the fear of death or even persistently worrying about how to break the news to his/her family or what they gonna do when he/she is gone. But, do you know all these? Do you care how they feel? When a blind man sitting right infront of you, do you know how he pictures you or what lies in his imagination? Empathy is a gift and it is accessible to all of us, but we have to find ourselves the opportunity to explore, to identify. Sometimes, a question as simple as "how are you?" would make someone's day. We may not be able to cure every sickness but listening is often the only thing needed to help someone and to discover great stories.
Take a step back, think it through, and reflect on what you have done for someone today.
"If you could stand in someone else's shoes, hear what they hear, see what they see, feel what they feel, would you treat them differently?"
-Pei Li-
Nice Video about seeing people as they really are. Empathy is about understanding why people feel the way they do. This helps us manage our own responses to them and avoids hurting them unfairly. But if you ask me to feel the way my patients feel (which is different from empathy), I think I can become so overwhelmed that I may find it difficult to make correct decisions. That is why we doctors are asked not to treat close family members because we are so invested in the outcome and we tend to mirror the feelings they feel. This clouds the decision making process.
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ReplyDeleteOften, I find myself confusing with sympathy and empathy. Those are really good thoughts prof. Guess there's a limit in whatever things we do. And for that, I'm gonna take time to realize.
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