I have recently encountered a patient who was diagnosed with enterocutaneous fistula and has been put on long term nil by mouth and supplemented with total parenteral nutrition. Day in and day out I realised that she is getting more depressed, not only because she has to be hospitalised for a long period but on top of all, she is unable to eat.
Often when we are in situation as such we tried to show our empathy and support. We care for the patient and we try to understand their sorrow.
It's not wrong for us to try to cheer the patient up. It's okay for us to tell her the truth and her progress, to tell her that I am very sorry you are not allowed to eat and have to be on intravenous nutrition, because what patient wants from us, is to be genuine and honest.
But it's not okay to use use "I understand your situation," loosely, because to be frank, we can never really understand. I can never imagine if I have to be in the situation like this, where I cannot eat at all, for the next 2 to 3 months.
Sometimes as managing doctors, it's actually not so important for us to emphasise that "we also understand your pain", because that is only doing justice to our own conscientious and guilt, but to be able to be by their side, and listen to them, addressing their concerns and checking their progress while only conservative management is being carried out, may mean so much more.
KY
